SkinnyME

The big bad hump

How do I get over this hump??? I'm SO stuck.

Thank you all for your kinds words. I know you are all right, I just need to give myself time and stick to plan, eat good foods for my body and exercise, so simple no? Then why is it SO fucking difficult?

It was my birthday yesterday and honestly I felt like shit. The day before (saturday) I went shopping and guess what?? I went up 3 fucking sizes =(. I couldn't believe myself, I stood in the changing room utterly disgusted with myself, I wanted to cry so bad but I couldn't my mom was waiting outside to see how the pants fit, I showed her and she was shocked too, the size 13 pants were SO tight. I tried on the 14's, TIGHT. 15?? They didn't have any 15's. It was so embarassing asking for a 15. In the beginning of this year I was a size 12. Last year I was a size 10-11. What am I gona be next year size 20?

I don't know what's happening to me. I need help. I need support. I need a hug. I need someone who understand me. I need a friend. I don't have any of that here. That's one of the reasons I made this blog so I could gain support from others that are on the same journey. I have been truly inspired by so many of you.

I tell myself everyday, I can do it, I can do it. But why can't I? Why is it that whenever I get serious about something, I step on the scale and am disappointed, discouraged. Everything goes to a waste after that, I stop exercising, thinking what's the fucking point, I'm going to be fat forever. Then a few days later I see an amazing dress and I want it so bad and tell myself again I can do it, I can do it. It all repeats over and over again.

Someone please smack me. Tell me, "it's so easy" just stick with it Min..you can do it, you are better then this, you can make your life change, believe in yourself.

I feel like I'm breaking inside, everything is so hard, so out of reach for me, ALWAYS.

Someone help...

posted by seemzy @ 6:50 PM